If you've been reading Beach Eats for a while, you'll know that I've done my fair share of whining about the exasperating event that is grocery shopping in Manhattan. Last summer I likened it to the running of the bulls and I wasn't exaggerating. In that same piece I offered a tip to Fairway shoppers: shop the organic section upstairs ... the check-out lines are smaller and more efficient. Well, that was then and this is now - the upstairs check-out lines have exploded. Just last Friday I waited 15 minutes in line behind 12 other shoppers, all for some organic broccoli, silken tofu and a Kashi frozen pizza. Sigh.To make matters worse, 8 out of 12 of those shoppers were wearing the most alarming hats imaginable. What is it about organic shoppers that engenders a fondness for the most absurd forms of head gear? Have you noticed this ... or is it just me? ~cue crickets~ Just me? Ok, we'll move on. But not before I note for the record that my own head was bare. The silly hat parade did not include yours truly.
Either it was a slow news day on Saturday, or Fairway frustrations are coming to a head ... because the front page of the New York Times featured an article about the quirky and terrifying Fairway elevator. I might have written it myself - if Glen Collins hadn't beaten me to the punch ... or if the New York Times cared to employ me in any fashion! ~wink~ The husband passed me the article Saturday afternoon, saying: "you're going to love this, its about you!" And in a way, he's right. I'm part of the "elevator cognoscenti" Collins mentions. I know the protocol, I know where the elusive call-button is hidden and, more importantly, I know how to hold the door open for others, lest they get caught in its swift iron jaws.
Click the link and take a spin through Mr. Collins' amusing article. You'll be rewarded with another brief glimpse into the glamorous life of La Diva, such as it is, and a few chuckles to boot. Look carefully next time you're trapped in that elevator ... I might just be there beside you.
So, tell me about your shopping experience. Do you bask in the luxury of wide aisles and a stunning array of products? Or are you navigating as tiny and treacherous a space as us Fairway combatants? Curious Diva wants to know.
Bon appetite!
10 comments:
You know, I'm a little put out that after following your advice to try the organic section upstairs at Fairway, I checked in here today to find you mocking the pretty hat I put on Friday to go shopping!
Just kidding! No Fairway for me, in pretty hats or otherwise.
:-)
I get distracted by everything shiny. It takes a long time.
Deborah - if you'd seen the hats in question you'd be mocking right along with me. I should take a picture next time! (kidding too)
LOL, Blonde Duck!
Darling Diva: The funny hats are to hide the bedhead. Don't you know that we lovers of all things organic don't usually get out of our pajamas until 3 p.m. Try it. You'll like it.
Ann Garrity
President
Organic Diva, LLC
"Sensible Cosmetics for the Seriously Divine"
www.organicdivas.com
I'm sorry your stores are so crowded. I love the comment on the hats! :) So, here in CA our stores are really big and they just keep getting bigger. In fact, they opened such a big Whole Foods at one point that I went to work telling everyone to go there on a Saturday afternoon to just take it all in for a few hours... you should come visit CA just to go grocery shopping. :) Let me know if there's anything you are dying to have that I can send you. :)
Oh dear you get the hats too. When I go to the farm shop there are alot of 'pretentious' people who look like they are about to partake in a mountain climb expedition. They are usually city people who come to live in the country. You do not get such ridiculous head wear in the lower priced supermarkets LOL! X
Diva Dad and I often have a bad hat award contest unbeknown to the poor mocked hat-wearers in the vicinity. I have entered it several times myself with my green and purple felt number, bought at a crafts fair in a moment of weakness, which always brings a few laughs to my family (wouldn't dare wear it with friends) and a velvet-brimmed hat which has been worn once or twice. If the truth were known the Diva has a few hats herself which, though flattering, rarely see the light of day but look great on the hat rack her Dad built for her awhile ago. Hat mocking makes for a fun winter activity up here in the frozen north. Try it you'll like it!
Organic Diva - thanks for the chuckle and I hope you know I'm kidding too. Its just that New Yorkers tend to take things to the extreme ... hats are no exception. Just this morning I saw a woman in a fur hat that was the size of a small vehicle. Sigh.
Meanwhile, I'm looking forward to checking out your site ... sounds interesting!
Juliet - oh how I envy you left-coasters your expansive spaces! We do have a few Whole Foods locations here that are large by our standards ... but nothing compared to yours I'm sure. Aren't you sweet for that offer?! Thanks. :)
Vintage Kitten - It cheers me to know that the silly hats are as much a part of your landscape as mine. We have a common bond! LOL
Pixelgal - Papa Diva invented the "silly hat parade" ... I think of him every time I see one. You've proved that my will to mock is inherited! LOL
I am rather partial to hats, lovely, fashionable hats, of course ... and you're right I don't wear them often enough. I think I resolved to "wear more hats" back in 2008 ... and we all know how that turned out. ;)
We in the south have the stores of the large and spacious variety. Wide aisles, great selections and oversized carts.
Sorry Diva, but we also have the red necks and Nascar or camouflage hats so we're even there.
Deb
Deb - I figured you for the luxuriously large markets ... but hadn't considered the camo hats! LOL
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