Monday, August 25, 2008

Ohm ...

The husband and I were supposed to be away on vacation this past week /weekend, but the vicissitudes of his job being what they are, it recently became clear that going away would not be possible. Though we may not be able to have a proper get-away until October, I recognized that we were both in need of a mental holiday. Last week, a friend and I spent a fair amount of time surfing the web for spas and we were both intrigued by The Chopra Center at the Dream Hotel. After quelling my inital gag reflex over the Chopra-ness of it all, I decided to book some time there for the husband and I on Saturday afternoon.

What with being a Diva and all, you'd think that I soak up the pampering experiences like a sponge, right? Um, not exactly. I'm not a great fan of massage and, if I'm being honest, I'm not a great fan of any experience which requires individuals to be in a state of public undress. Let's face it, there's good naked and bad naked. I'm not telling you anything you don't already know. Good naked happens in the privacy of your own home and bad naked ... well, that covers just about everything else.

Case in point: Jerry Stiller swims at my pool. Several mornings a week, I am treated to the sight of him in his droopy jams. This is bad naked. Trust me. Ok, so really he's half-clothed, but in my book it still qualifies. You get the picture.

I'll give you a minute to scrub that mental imagine from your brain - and use the time to offer my deepest apologies to Mr. Stiller. He's actually a very nice, gracious and friendly man. He's lovely to everyone at the pool. Both he and his bating suit are fine - I kid, I kid! My point is simply that, gym locker rooms not with standing, I prefer humanity to remain clothed. Period. I prefer myself to remain clothed. Period. So, the spa environment is something of a challenge for me. Period.

I cast my reservations aside and booked the husband and I for The Udi Room - a treatment which involves mud, steam, sea salt and 4,000 gallons of sweat. Initially I read the description as: "Relax in a delightful stream while the natural principals of the muds extract toxins from the skin." Relaxing in a stream? Awesome! Loving water as much as I do, it sounded like heaven. However, my reading prescription must be in need of updating ... because the word was steam, not stream. Uh oh.

You can imagine my surprise upon entering the 125 degree room. Yikes! HOT! So hot I though I might die of it ... but I didn't. Once I relaxed it was actually pretty neat. The room had some overhead rainfall showers, which were extremely cold, and that icy water saved me from death. We emerged relaxed, peaceful and throughly exfoliated. My skin has never been so soft. It was altogether delightful and I can't wait to do it again.

I followed the Udi with an herbal bath and the husband had a massage. Suffice it to say that we have been pampered into a state of detoxified bliss and our visit to the Chopra spa was indeed like a mini-vacation. I can't say enough good things about it. The spa is spectacularly clean, the technicians talented and discreet, and the overall atmosphere is calm and inviting. I recommend it highly. Namaste!


pixelgal said...

Where have I gone wrong....a Chopra moment indeed! I know, I know, it sounds wonderful, but CHOPRA???? I guess as long as your brain remains un chopra-ized I can't object too much to a calm, unstressed and smooth Diva and husband. Maybe I should try it too (ugh, ugh, ugh) But tonight I'll settle for your recipe for stuffed squash using another of bro's giant zucchini that could definitely be donated to the Yankees. They couldn't miss hitting the ball with this enormous veg...or could they?


1.) Massages are painful, I don't know how anyone can find them relaxing.

2.) Sarcastic thanks for putting that awful mental picture of Jerry Stiller in my head, now I'm going to be going around all day shuddering and trying to distract myself from that HIDEOUS mental image!

Scarlet x

Sass said...

I am loving this entry. I absolutely shudder at the thought of a massage. Too much touchy-feely. How I ever managed to create three children is beyond me.

Thanks for the entertainment, my friend!


Deb said...

Now I on the other hand adore anything massage. I go for the deep tissue tyoe though to workout the work and computer related knots I develop in my neck and shoulders ( I seem to get ingrossed and forget to break). Your day sounds divine, I need a spa day after reading your description.

Perhaps the one good experience will awaken you to the world of spa visits, relaxation and enjoyment.


The Diva on a Diet said...

Its good to know I'm not the only one who feels hinky about massage!

Scarlet - sorry about that mental image ... but welcome to my world! LOL

You're most welcome, Sass ... and right back atcha!

Deb - I'm def. going back for that Udi treatment and the herbal bath again ... so who knows?!

pixelgal - fear not, we haven't been throughly Chopraized. ;)